Surreal

I don't know for how long
has darkness surrounded me
time has flown so fast n' now
it all seems like eternity
I look at the waters of the stream
but find no reflection of the real me
demons unleashed; haunt n' tease
as fears move with a lot of ease
trials keep pouring; there's no stopping
they seem to be testing me endlessly
my head is spinning round n' round
my mind is chaotic with all the sounds
at every crossroad, I lose my way
O! will this ever end some day?

I close my eyes n' I see the gleam
a rainbow of lights or so it seems
as life appears on a new canvas
the splendid colors make me anxious
I enjoy every moment I live here
with peace n' bliss that endear
I yearn for this to be true n' real
but, alas! it's my dream n' it's surreal!

Never at ease

My life's been an expanse of darkness

hurt and agony flowing in boundless

a rampant world, plagued with chaos 

beseeched with voices lacking ethos

as continuing strife, beckoned my life

the vast blackness kept growing inside

as I grew, I lost out on my spark

my will kept fading into the dark

my trapped mind, nobody could see

O! how much I wanted to set it free

I was held up there with nowhere to go

death of a loved one, came as a blow

the innocence, enslaved n' slained

so deeply embedded has been the pain

the fear that lurked deep within

contrived n' usurped my love-in

the uneasiness that set within me

locked my essence for eternity

as the turbulence within refused to cease

I realised I have never been at ease!

Love fell apart...

I did not leave love,
'twas love that left me!

I thought our love was strong
how then did everythin' go so wrong?
our love seemed blithe n' all was right
but as it grew bandy, it shattered me
it left me alone with sorrow n' pain
O! how could our love be so vain

I did not leave love,
'twas love that left me!

you were mine n' meant to stay
why then my love, did you go away?
with you, you took away our dreams
our world, our joy n' all the gleams
the anger, the despair n' the darkness
tears flow down in streams now endless

I did not leave love,
'twas love that left me!

it's hurting a lot within

but I will not let it show

how much I loved him 

he will never ever know

for when he did depart

our love fell apart

I did not leave love, 

'twas love that broke my heart!

Endless Journey

I heard the voice inside that said ~
"You'll seek what you want in the end"
I thought I then knew what I had to do
So I started traversing on paths anew
on the roads that were less taken
not meant for the crest-fallen
I continued on my stride
even when the winds pried
keepin' my spirits alive
o'er the raging tide
reprising the only voice
that I heard inside
I strode deeper and deeper
determined to reach sooner
I dabbled over my choices
aimed at a central quest
to seek the end n' define the "I"
to sieve the truth from the lie
I continued to wander across the lands
thru' the mystifying n' changing sands
I did this for many many years
letting my hope cast away my fears
but at the twists n' turns of the alley
serendipity paved way for melancholy
as I reached the peak of my journey
my virtues got chained
I saw that the mysteries of nature
were rife with rules insane
the voice that I heard initially
lost clarity n' was strained
at last I realised that all that I sought
'twas all only in my thoughts
for the journey had no end
as there was no end to the road
my pursuit was a tryst
as the end did not exist!!

Abyss

she has always been alone
trapped in the dark abyss
unwanted, rebuked n' abused
with loneliness as her only ally
she has known it now for long
that solitude is her only rescue
from all her dreaded despair
that tears are her only comfort
through the dark murky nights
that the discerned road to death
is the only solace to her life
where inveigled love seemed
like a blessing in disguise
but turned out to be a curse
devouring the translucent joys
seasons transformed and faded
the decisions she had taken then
in the myriad appeared jaded
when fear kept tightening its grip
and choking her on her breath
she strived and struggled to rise
but as the descent gained space
she lost the smile from her face
the emotions which she thought
that would forever last
receded gradually into her past
and the true image of her soul
got swallowed as a whole
and forever she remained
trapped in the blackhole

I am nothing without you…

My heart beats only for you

My body aches to be one with you

My soul looks around to seek you

I feel I am nothing without you...

As tears steadily flow from my eyes

the moistness in my cheeks begin to dry

I long to rest on your chest but it can't be

for we are separated by miles of sea

When you are not around, my heart goes sinking

for you are the only one that I think about 

When you are not around, I feel like dying

for you are the only one, I truly love

Without you, the world means nothing to me

it’s only you who can keep alive my soul

my heart's with you, come, embrace me my love -

for I am nothing without you...

I Love You

Our relation is of a special kind

transcending between space and time

where every moment I am thinking of you

wanting to hear you, feel you, see you

my body and my heart belong to you

you are my soulmate, I Love You!

If not for you, I would've never known

what true love really meant

I’d never've felt this inner peace

I couldn’t have been so content

your presence brightens my day

come what may, I need you in every way!

You make me feel blissful and complete

in your company, I do not resist

you accept me the way I'm, you let me be

I give myself unto you willingly

with you all my dreams have come true

you are my special someone, I Love You!